Sleep Deprivation in Parents: Tips on How to Improve Your Sleep

Parenting a newborn is no joke!

The tiny little secret about becoming a new parent is that “newborns and exhaustion” go together like peanut butter and jelly. Everyone knows that being the parent of a newborn, in the beginning, comes with a certain amount of sleep deprivation.

Research shows new parents experience significant sleep loss each night, and this sleep disruption, known as "revenge bedtime procrastination," can still persist years later. [1]

There's good news for new parents struggling with sleep after having a baby. Here are effective strategies to help you get the rest you deserve.

What Is Sleep Deprivation in New Parents

The phrase refers to obtaining less than the needed amount of sleep. When someone describes sleep deprivation, it's often based on the sleep duration, the total amount of time someone spends asleep.

It’s not just you who have felt this way – most parents, since the dawn of time, have craved good sleeping tips. You’re not alone in wanting to get off the sleep deprivation carousel you now find yourself on.

Fragmented sleep prevents parents from spending enough time in deep and REM sleep, which are the stages responsible for physical recovery, emotional regulation, and mental clarity.

Visit our blog to understand the effects of sleep deprivation.

How Newborn Sleep Patterns Affect Parental Sleep

Babies have small stomachs and immature digestive systems. This can lead to frequent feedings throughout the day. It can lead to frequent wake-ups in the night, which is a common cause of sleep deprivation for new parents.

Remember, newborns don’t understand the concept of day and night yet. Newborns do not have a circadian rhythm in the early weeks, which contributes to their irregular sleep patterns. Their sleep cycles are short, lasting around 2-4 hours.

Practical Sleep Tips for Sleep Deprived New Parents

Try to understand how sleep deprivation affects your daily function and feelings. Don't be hard on yourself; that will not do you any good.

If possible, try to identify what could be the culprit resulting in problems with your sleep. For example, is it because your baby isn't sleeping?

Or do you have trouble falling back to sleep after settling the baby?

Once you understand sleep deprivation, you can try some of the strategies listed below with your partner to help you get the sleep you both need.

Additionally, consider coping mechanisms to manage sleep deprivation, such as taking short naps, sharing nighttime duties, and seeking support from family and friends.

Does “Sleep When Your Baby Sleeps” Actually Work?

New parents, you don’t have to feel pressured to be productive during baby naps. Instead, try to take a short 20- to 30-minute nap.

It can help you feel refreshed without causing sleep inertia, that uncomfortable “groggy” feeling when you wake.

If your baby is not following a regular nap schedule, this is a great opportunity to take advantage of offers of help from relatives and friends.

Let them enjoy the time with the newborn while you can catch up on your zzz’s.

Maintain a Healthy and Active Lifestyle

You are new parents and have a baby now -- it's more important than ever to be at the top of your health game. Just like finding time to exercise isn't selfish, neither is choosing better-quality fuel for your body.

Focus on eating a rainbow of fresh foods, including fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.

Eating healthy food can boost your metabolism. Start your day right by eating a nutrient-rich breakfast and healthy snacks throughout the day. Make sure to drink plenty of water, as dehydration can also make you feel tired.

Prioritizing your own sleep is equally important, as it aids in managing exhaustion and plays a critical role in mental health, parenting effectiveness, and overall well-being during the postpartum period.

It's recommended to limit the amount of caffeine, which has shown it can actually make you more tired. Learn more about how long caffeine stays in your body.

Daily Exercise: Take Time and Enjoy the Outside

Everything can seem like a monumental task when you'’re feeling like a sleep-deprived zombie. The last thing you might feel like doing is squeezing in a workout, too! But trust me, you should aim to get outside and exercise, even for a little bit, every day.

Exercise can help you feel more awake and energized, making it easier to tackle daily tasks. Self-care is not selfish.

Exercise can have a positive effect on your mental health and help you fall asleep. Finding your “me time” felt practically non-existent when your kids were younger. But once you are ready to drag yourself away for a workout, you'll discover that the energy will last throughout the day.

Related Blog: Conquer Morning Fatigue: Tips to Wake Up Energized

For new moms, make sure you've gotten the all-clear from your doctor to exercise. You're not competing against anyone but yourself, so start slow. Here are some ideas to help you get started.

• Put the baby in a stroller and try a 30-minute walk around the neighborhood.
• Find a 20-minute exercise video to do at home.
• Spending 10 minutes stretching on your yoga mat can feel amazing.

Worry less about what time of day is best to exercise and just make time, any time, to boost your body's endorphins and other feel-good hormones. Make sure to listen to your body.

How New Parents Can Create a Flexible Sleep Schedule

Creating a disciplined bedtime routine will pay off in future years. Once your baby starts sleeping through the night, next, you'll be asking how much sleep older children need.

Establishing consistency from the beginning, you're instilling good “sleep hygiene” for the whole family.

Managing nighttime feedings within this routine is crucial, as it helps the baby associate nighttime with sleep rather than play, and allows parents to regain sleep whenever possible.

Sleeping can be challenging for a new parent. Read our blog to learn how to fix your sleep schedule.

What you're aiming for now, Mom and Dad is more sleep quality instead of sleep quantity.

Recently published in the journal Scientific Reports, it highlights that adults not only need to get enough quality sleep every night, but adults also need to maintain a consistent sleep routine. [2]

Related Blog: Practice Good Sleep Hygiene

How to Create a Sleep Environment That Helps New Parents

Creating a cool and soothing sleep environment can do wonders for both you and your partner, as well as your newborn.

Below, I've included some examples.

• Darkness is Key: Dim the lights or use blackout curtains in your room as well as the nursery. The darkness can help to signal sleep time. A quiet environment is equally important to help everyone relax and rejuvenate.
• White Noise Machine: Block out unwanted noise at night with the help of a white noise machine. They can also be used to create a calming and familiar sound for your newborn.
• Bed Cooling System: Keep your bed cool and comfortable with a Chilipad temperature-controlled mattress pad. The temperature can stay consistent throughout the night from 60-115ºF.

This also includes creating a safe sleep environment for your baby. [3]

Why Dimming the Lights Helps

After you swaddle your baby and turn off the lights in the nursery, try to do the same in your bedroom. At the end of the day, your brain craves cooler, darker temperatures to sleep.

Light exposure, especially blue light, from your TV can disrupt your circadian rhythm, making it harder to fall asleep.

Whether from your phone or TV, either can alter your body's sleep signals, so put those phones away and turn off that late-night T.V. binge. Learn more about how blue light affects sleep.

Take Time to Develop a Nighttime Routine

As a new parent, there will be plenty of nights with interrupted sleep. Leading up to bedtime, some start to feel anticipatory anxiety. To help reduce this unwanted anxiety, some specialist recommends beginning the evening with grounding techniques such as meditation or deep breathing exercises or meditation.

Did You Know: Creating a calming environment during nighttime feeding can also help minimize disruptions and promote quicker sleep after feeding.

You can also take a warm bath, read a book, or listen to relaxing music, as each can help you and your mind relax leading to the bed. Try to avoid screen time, as the blue light can cause you to have a difficult time falling asleep.

Tips on How to Slow Your Racing Mind

Now that you’ve prepped your bedroom for a good night’s sleep take some time to slow your racing mind. Start by focusing on your breathing. Stress can significantly impact sleep quality, making it harder to fall and stay asleep.

If you need help, listen to soothing sounds podcasts, or try meditation, deep breathing exercises, or Yoga Nidra.

These can help with some parents who often feel anxious or stressed leading up to bedtime as they anticipate interrupted sleep.

You can also take a warm bath, read a book, or listen to relaxing music, as each can help you and your mind relax leading to the bed. Give them a try and see which works best for you.

But make sure you try to avoid screen time, as the blue light can cause you to have a difficult time falling asleep.

That Loving Bond: Take Care of Each Other

When one-half of the new-parent team works outside the home, it's tempting for the at-home half to handle all the feedings so the "working" one can get up in the morning.

However, taking on round-the-clock feedings can lead to severe sleep deprivation.

Relationships are valuable. You might become irritable and say hurtful things. By mutual agreement, overlook them. Trust me, that's the lack of sleep talking.

Taking turns with nightly feeding and other duties can make a big difference by reducing fatigue. One can manage all the feedings while the other is sleeping. By doing this, at least one of you can get a good night's sleep.

What Helps New Parents Get Better Sleep

Better sleep does not mean more hours. It means fewer disruptions and faster recovery. Strategies that help include alternating nighttime duties, napping strategically, controlling bedroom temperature, and creating a calm wind-down routine even for short sleep windows.

Yes - There Is Better Sleep Ahead

Maybe you've heard the cliche “the days are long, but the years are short” and thought, “Nope, nothing about parenting a baby feels short or easy.”

As a new parent, you may not always get the necessary hours of sleep. The first three months can be particularly challenging due to the newborn's feeding schedule and lack of a sleep routine, which can significantly impact your physical and mental wellbeing.

But using the tips above, you’ve learned how to get rest with a newborn, which will certainly boost your sleep quality.

Sleep deprivation and newborns, the struggle is real! I like to say that a well-rested parent is a happier parent.